I went for a job interview today. It was for a part time job doing visual merchandising, something that I am very familiar with or should I say I can do that job in my sleep. As I sat in the waiting room my mind became flooded with questions. Why did I feel that this was my only option? How could I dumb down my experience just enough so that I wouldn’t be intimidating? Will I ever be able to live the life I want to live, that I am suppose to live? Will she think I’m to old to know anything about whats fashionable? As my name was called I decided that I was doing what I had to do and told my voices in my head to shut up! I was very relaxed in the interview, maybe a little to relaxed. I probably had been doing visual longer than this girl had been alive! But I tried not to let on. Thank God I don’t look my age so there were no questions about that. I walked out, not feeling good but feeling as though I was a sell out. That I had put a for sale sign on my soul. I know that I have to make a living, but why can’t I believe/trust that I can make a living from my creative talents? I have well meaning people in my life that would probably be ecstatic if I decided to be a medical assistant or something that would be a real career. But that’s not who I am.† I spend so much time on looking for a real job, stressing about my finances, that I don’t work on the things that are in my heart that† I could make a living from. As I reflect on the 2 words that I chose to focus on for the new year free & easy.†I realize that working in a job that I hate or that I have outgrown does not fall in the category of†easy. That saying life is short is very true, life is very short! Wouldn’t you rather spend it being happy,† and fulfilled? I know I would. It’s time to do things different so that I can get a different result!
††††††††††My Soul Is calling for me to go in the direction of my purpose, by FAITH